Computer Lover Cooking Terms

1. ACCELERATOR: Microwave
2. ACCESS DENIED: Diet Time
3. ALT: As in “alt and pepper to taste”
4. ASCII: Callii Tech Support
5. AUTOEXEC.BAT: Cookies in your boss’ car
6. BACKSLASH: Do to piecrust before cooking
7. BACKUP: Leftovers
8. BASIC: PBJ Sandwich
9. BATCH: Mess o’
10. BINARY: Buy nary, eat nary
11. BLOCK: Cake baked with no eggs
12. BOOT: Heat your oven
13. CACHE: Do when egg is rolling off counter
14. CAD: Someone who promises to cook, then doesn’t
15. CD: When you don’t core apples before baking
16. CLUSTER: Kitchen advisors
17. COMMAND: Tell someone else to cook
18. COMPRESS: Knead
19. CONFIG.SYS: Have your sister figure it out
20. COPY: Double recipe
21. CRASH: Drop main course at big dinner party
22. CTRL: What you lose after crashing
23. CURSOR: Who you are after crashing
24. CUSTOMIZE: Add sprinkles
25. DATA: Sort-a like-a fig-a
26. DEBUG: Check the flour before using
27. DIP-SWITCH: What you do when you’re out of salsa
28. DIRECTORY: De place where de priest lives
29. DOCUMENT: Small, after-dinner candy
30. DOS: Dine Or Starve
31. DOT MATRIX: Dorothy’s mother
32. DOWNLOAD: Pour batter into pan
33. DOWNTIME: Time while brownies are baking
34. DRAG: Time while brownies are baking
35. ENTER: Put in oven
36. ESCAPE: Order out
37. EXPANSION: Too much yeast
38. EXPORT: Take leftovers to the neighbors
39. EXTRACT: Usually vanilla
40. F.A.T.: See “Access denied”
41. FASTOPEN: Do to oven when you overbake
42. FLOPPY: Bake longer next time
43. FOLDER: Blender
44. FRAGMENT: What’s left of brownies
45. FREEZE: Do when you accidently quadruple the recipe
46. GIGA-BYTE: Enough for an army
47. GOTO: As in “Goto restaurant when recipe bombs”
48. HELP: Julia Child
49. HIGH DENSITY: Forgot to fold in the eggs
50. HIGHLIGHT: Top with white icing
51. ICON: I con cook anything better than you con
52. IMPORT: Borrow a cup of sugar
53. INTERFACE: Where a lady puts her dinner
54. LAPTOP: Eat only the icing
55. LOADHIGH: Put in freezer
56. LOG ON: Cook in fireplace
57. LOGIC: Why somebody else should cook
58. LOOP: Why somebody else thinks you should cook
59. LPT1: Put on front burner
60. MAINFRAME: Oven
61. MEG: Mc chickens lay ’em
62. MEGA-BYTE: Slow down!
63. MEGA-HERTZ: When you forget to use a potholder
64. MEMORY: Forget it – use a timer
65. MENU: Surely you’re kidding
66. MERGE: Nickname for margarine
67. MICROCHIPS: Serve with micro salsa
68. MODEM: Top with ice cream
69. MONITOR: Oven window
70. MONO: One-burner stove
71. MOTHERBOARD: Mom’s tired of cooking
72. NANOSECOND: Time it takes to eat DOS-Serts
73. NERD: Someone who understands this whole glossary
74. NETWORK: I slice, you dice
75. NORTON: Maybe he’ll fix these recipes for you
76. PARAMETERS: Kitchen doors
77. PARSE: Nickname for parsley
78. PASSWORD: “Dinnertime”
79. PATH: Worn-out place leading to refrigerator
80. POSTCRIPT: Dessert
81. RAM: Overeat
82. ROM: Overeat in England
83. SCANNER: Guest deciding whether to eat
84. SCROLL: Recite list of ingredients
85. SELECT: Choose edible portion
86. SERIAL: What you eat when you burn dinner
87. SHAREWARE: Mom’s crock pot
88. SHIFT: “Cap” cake with icing
89. SORT: Pick the burnt ones out
90. SPREADSHEET: Use under really messy cooks
91. TAB: Drink after “Pie A La Modem”
92. TECH SUPPORT: Hello, Mom?
93. TOGGLE: Switch recipes
94. TURBO: High setting on microwave
95. VGA: Add food coloring
96. ZOOM: I can see it on the table now

From “Quick Bytes: Computer Lover’s Cookbook” by Diane Pfeifer

Can you think of more?? Post a comment if you do.